Monday, June 13, 2016

I Have Loved You


When I was a preteen, I wrote poetry all the time. Something about the fluid, rhythmic nature of poetry helped me express deep emotions in a way no other method could. Today, I share my first poem in years. It is called "I Have Loved You". 

I have loved you in the midst of the shriveling ache,
 the negative signs my sorrow make.
I have loved you though we have never met,
my hope for you a worthless net.
I have loved you enough to recognize the pit,
nothing, no matter how good, a perfect fit.
Your absence is a grief, strangling and deep.
I hide it and give it away, but the peace never keeps.
Please God, tell me how to cope
With grief that smothers every faith and hope.
Time doesn't help, the desolation only deepens,
The path to the one I have loved only steepens.
God, You tell me to trust You, to arise and go
But maybe I want to give up, I hate that only You know.
I have loved you as I watch others live my dream,
I sink beneath the waters as they flourish in the cream.
I have loved you as I watch the light dim in my beloved's eyes.
We miss you together, him and I.
Though you may exist only in my heart, your future with me unclear,
I have loved you, will always love you, through the unending years.